“You don’t stop having fun when you get old. You get old when you stop having fun.” — Anonymous

One of the bedrock principles of the Renewed Man program is that long-term success in recovery from addiction -- including addictive sexual behaviors -- is not, fundamentally, an issue of subtraction. It's about addition.

Obviously we START the journey of recovery with the goal of subtraction. We want to exclude (insert behavior here) from our lives. Get rid of it. Be "sober" from it.

But the $100,000 question is, what then? What will we add? What will we do instead? If we take out an important coping strategy, a crutch that we have grown to lean on, what will we put in its place?

We have a name for people who never answer this question: chronic relapsers.

The 10th key of "PURPOSE" has to do with finding a big, important purpose for your life (ie. connecting to your MISSION), but it also has to do with more simple, mundane things that you can add into your life to bring more peace and joy.

What can you do to add more fun to your life? More joy? What can you do that will help you relax when you're stressed out?

Here's how the prolific young adult novelist Rainbow Rowell puts it:

“So, what if, instead of thinking about solving your whole life, you just think about adding additional good things? One at a time. Just let your pile of good things grow.” 

NEXT ACTION:

Today's action step is very simple: Think about what non-addictive, non-destructive pleasurable things you can add into your life. If you can, do one of them today!