Last fall, I started a personal experiment. The backstory is too long to get into here, but the driving question was actually pretty simple:

What could I do to (significantly and measurably) raise the level of joy and energy I experience in my day-to-day life?

Yes I know that joy and energy are related, but they’re not the same thing. And they both matter. I built a simple way to track them daily, and I invited a small group of people at our church to explore this with me. We’ve been reading, experimenting, comparing notes, and learning from one another along the way.

This project is still ongoing. But after about five months, I can say this with confidence: I’ve seen real, measurable improvement in my own life. And others in the group report the same thing. 

Here’s the problem we keep running into, though -- and I suspect you’ll recognize it:

Most of us already KNOW what changes would likely help us feel better. We know what would increase our energy. We know what would deepen our sense of joy. The hard part isn’t figuring out what needs to change. The hard part is actually doing those things consistently.

I realize that what I'm talking about here might not interest you. Maybe you feel like you already have plenty of energy, and your life is marked by a deep sense of joy. If that’s true, that’s wonderful. I hope you’re grateful for it -- and I hope you keep doing whatever you’re doing.

But if not -- if you find yourself running low on energy, feeling flat or discouraged, or wondering why joy feels harder to come by than it used to -- then keep reading.

I’m not going to offer a neat, seven-step formula for fixing your life. I haven't learned enough yet to even try to offer a definitive list of strategies. This learning and project are still ongoing. But I DO want to share one insight that I believe makes a huge difference.

Start with this simple exercise: Take a minute and write down the things you already know would help increase your energy and joy. 

Better sleep. Less screen time. More movement. Healthier food. More meaningful connection. Less stress. More prayer. Less hurry. Whatever comes to mind.

Most people can come up with a pretty good list without much effort. And usually, it’s a helpful list. The problem isn’t that we don’t know what would help. No. As I said earlier, the real problem is that we can't consistently DO the things we know would help build these qualities -- and/or avoid the things we know diminish them. Something keeps getting in the way.

One of the biggest drains on our joy and energy -- far more than most of us realize -- is some form of compulsive behavior. We're doing something too much, and we struggle to keep the limits we set. Nobody wants to use the word "addiction" to little everyday things, but what else do you call it?

Sometimes our struggles are obvious addictions to things like alcohol, drugs, pornography or gambling. But often it’s less obvious and more socially acceptable: food, shopping, news consumption, social media, gaming, streaming, or endless scrolling.

These things don’t just rob us of our time. They gradually reshape our brains, flatten our motivation, and drain our capacity for joy. 

And here's the painful truth we need to face: Almost everything around us is increasingly being engineered to become ever more addictive. This hasn’t happened overnight. It’s been unfolding for decades, largely unnoticed.

Sometimes these compulsive behaviors themselves are the obvious robbers of our energy and joy. We recognize clearly how our use of them reduces these levels. Maybe in the exercise above, you identified stopping a certain bad habit as one of the essential keys you need to build your energy and joy. The reason you're having a hard time stopping -- or limiting -- it is because it's addictive in some way.

But the compulsive behaviors that surround us also just get in the way, and keep us from consistently doing the other positive things we know would help bring us joy and raise our energy levels. Exercise, connecting with friends, engaging in a life-giving hobby, getting good sleep ... all these take time. And we're constantly short of that. 

Why is this? Many reasons, of course ... and many of them are things we can't do much about. But there is one thing that we can do something about -- and for many people it is the primary issues: We're losing so much time and energy to compulsive behaviors like scrolling, social media use, news media consumption, and the like. 

I wrote last year that Americans spend 4 and 1/2 hours a day on their smart phones. Recent estimates have gone up. Now it's over 5 hours a day ... some say as much as 5 hours and 15 minutes a day. Gen Z users average over 6 hours a day. 

One report puts it in these terms: "This daily habit, which includes checking phones about 186 to 205 times per day, translates to over 2.5 months a year spent on mobile devices" (source). 

So to restate the problem: The thing we identify as wanting to do less of might be a compulsive behavior. Of course we're going to fail in our efforts to control it! We keep failing to be consistent because it's not just a simple "habit" that we can decide to change. 

So instead of trying to “try harder,” I want to invite you into a different kind of reflection.

STEP ONE -- quick article read
Read the following article about what I call our Entanglement with modern “pleasure traps.” I wrote this recently, and it lays important groundwork for understanding what’s going on beneath the surface.