Personal Note: I hope you've been having a great summer! I've been busy getting ready for the launch of several Leadership Community Groups this Fall. I'm also doing research for my book "The Not So Overwhelmed Leader" due out in 2014. I hope you like the new design of this e-newsletter.

Free teleseminar - Thursday, August 22  I'm offering a free telephone conference call where I'll be talking about the new Leadership Community Groups - why we're doing them, how they will work, and how they will help you. The call is at 2pm central time ... if you sign up you'll get a recording of the call too. Sign up here:
http://forms.aweber.com/form/36/830819936.htm

Feature Article:
Why Loneliness Is So Dangerous

When people are isolated and lonely, it's not just sad, it's dangerous. This is especially true for people who are in any kind of leadership role -- if other people are counting on them, or looking to them for help, guidance, or support.

I've heard people in positions of spiritual leadership simply dismiss this as an unfortunate "vocational hazard." That's a copout. We are isolated and lonely because we don't really value community enough to be wise and deliberate about it. We've got to stop kidding ourselves about this: isolated people are a danger to themselves and the people they lead.

Lonely people are a danger in five specific ways:

1. Lonely people are more susceptible to feelings of sadness and clinical depression. Friends bring joy and encouragement, isolation leads to despair. Even if people think they can "tough it out" through bouts of depression, if they have family members or people in their church or organization that count on them, they have a moral obligation to do whatever they need to do to live with emotional and spiritual well-being.

2, Lonely people are more susceptible to anxiety and stress. If there is stress or conflict in our family or organization, and we don't have friends to give us perspective and help us decompress, we're in trouble, The stress and anxiety just gets multiplied. Having someone outside of that system is essential to help us manage anxiety.

3. Lonely people are more susceptible to discouragement. Without the chance to talk about our frustrations and discouragements, we lose a sense of context. Problems get magnified, solutions seem remote. And if our circle of friends only includes people in the organization we lead (as is often the case with pastors) we often can be fully honest in those relationships, and get the support we need.

4. Lonely people  are more susceptible to temptation. Isolation is a key factor in vulnerability to addiction and any kind of sinful habit. Friends offer accountability and support. In all my work in recovery, I have yet to meet an addict who has a strong circle of supportive friends. We have a saying in recovery: "Isolation destroys, healthy community heals."

5. Lonely people are more susceptible to doing stupid things. We can tend to over-react, or make decisions without thinking things through. Sometimes friends can help us by asking, "Are you sure you want to do that?"

Who is sending me this? Mark Brouwer is a pastor, leadership coach, and speaker who helps people live and lead with emotional and spiritual health. He is pastor of Jacob's Well Church Community in Evergreen Park, IL. He is the director of Renew Resources Group, which offers teaching, mentoring, and coaching. He writes for sexualsanity.com and lastingleaders.com, and is author of the forthcoming book: The Not So Overwhelmed Leader.

"Show me your friends and I'll show you your future." -Sue Nixon

CONTACT:


Phone: 708-636-5653
Email:  mark@lastingleaders.com