Turns out it’s not so easy. There are powerful forces keeping us stuck in the status quo. Many influences in our lives, both within and without, keep us stuck in passivity. In fact, there are so many roadblocks and distractions, it’s a wonder people do as much as they do! Here are some things that get in the way:

In part one, I talked about the first three roadblocks:

Now let's fill out the list:

Maybe our lives are too busy and stressful because we've lost sight of our priorities. We get so wrapped up in the work required to support ourselves that we’re unable to think of doing anything else. 

This is a complex topic, and everyone’s situation is different. This may or may not apply to you, but at least try to be honest with yourself and consider it. (By the way, you might not like this next part.)

Many of us are at our wits’ end, trying to make enough money to support our families and prepare for our future. Many of us are finding that the typical “Western Capitalist dream” -- marriage, kids, mortgage, cars, “good” schools, vacations, etc. -- creates tremendous financial pressure. Many people are struggling with unemployment, underemployed, and/or trying desperately to work their way out of mountains of debt.

And we’re making this all harder than it needs to be by over-consuming and living beyond our means.

When our lives become so focused around the struggle for financial security, we have little time or energy for anything else. Our dreams and desires about helping other people, making a mark in some way, get pushed aside by the realities of our financial challenges and the enormous time and energy it takes to support our lifestyles.

The reality that comedian Bill Hicks speaks about in his quote is uncomfortably true for too many people, whether or not alcohol is involved. We’re running ourselves ragged from Monday to Friday to make enough money to pay our bills, and then we spend our weekends almost comatose, trying to recover our energy and take care of whatever details need to be taken care of before the work week starts again. It’s a vicious, soul-sucking treadmill.

And somehow in the midst of that, our dreams about serving God, helping others, and making a difference in the world get lost.

This might be challenging and may get uncomfortable to face, but consider this: 

And we get trapped. The result? We work in jobs we hate, with chronic and destructive stress, and this work sucks up all of our time and energy, leaving little left over for the things that matter most to us. 

Some people intentionally choose to downsize financially so they have more time, energy, and creativity available for other pursuits that matter more to them. They downsize not because they have to, but because they want to. They want to because they know the happiness and peace that simplicity gives them far outweighs the “blessing” of a higher income.

One of my favorite examples from history is John Woolman, an 18th century merchant who was a devout Quaker and social activist. He campaigned against slavery, animal cruelty, and economic injustice. Woolman was dedicated to his own personal spiritual practice, as well as involvement in his spiritual community and social activist work. Woolman deliberately scaled back his business interests so that he had enough time to serve people in a variety of ways. If he got too busy, he would send customers to other merchants so that he could devote more time to the things that mattered the most to him.

I think this is what Jesus was talking about when he said you cannot serve both God and money (Matthew 6:24). Life doesn’t work well when the focus is constantly on getting more money. The point is not that money is bad, or that God doesn’t want us to be successful financially. I believe God does want success and true abundance for us. The point is that money is a terrible master, and “abundance” is about more than material wealth.

Remember: the teaching in I Timothy 6:10 is not that “money is the root of all evil”; the passage says that “the love of money” is the root of all kinds of evil. Money itself is not the problem. Love of money creates the problems. And it creates stressed-out people who are so busy trying to pay for their lifestyles that they lose sight of the higher purpose of living.

Everywhere we look, we can see problems, and when we focus too much on what is wrong with our world, we get overwhelmed and fall into despair. The problems seem so large and unsolvable that we throw up our hands and say, “What’s the use?”

Some get into this despair on a global scale, thinking that things are so bad in the world that we just need to protect ourselves and stay in our own huddles. We might feel despair about the degradation of the environment and climate change. Or we might feel despair about things we encounter in our personal lives; the people around us, thinking that their problems are so big, their relationships so messed up, their addictions so difficult, or their resistance to God so strong, that we don’t even want to try. Maybe we feel this despair about the church we’re a part of: We might feel that our church is so out of date, so out of touch, or that the ministries they’re inviting us into are so pointless, that it’s not even worth it.

This sense of despair gets heightened by our tendency towards grandiosity. If we don’t appreciate the value of doing “small things with great love,” as Mother Teresa suggests, we might not venture out. If we’re not willing to participate in something unless it’s a big success on a grand scale in a short amount of time, we’re likely to give up before we even start. I love how Dorothy Day puts it:

You can’t do everything, but you can do something. You can’t help everybody, but you can help somebody. You can’t fix poverty in your community, but you can make a dent in it. You can’t stop human trafficking, but you can help a person or two get out of the life. And on and on and on. 

You don’t need to change the whole world in order to change the world. Just change a part of it, and see what happens.

Many people get sidetracked -- or thrown out of the game entirely -- because they surrender to addictive habits that keep them from doing the important things they want to do in life. During times of spiritual alienation and community breakdown, addictions are rampant in societies. And that’s true today. 

Tragically, many of the people we desperately need right now to change society for the better are sitting on the sidelines, embroiled in their addictions.

Whether it’s drinking, gambling, sex, food, or some drug, here’s what many people forget about addictions: 

People spend enormous amounts of time fantasizing about acting out (with whatever activity or substance they are using), preparing to act out, acting out, and then dealing with the fallout from acting out. On top of all this time loss, people struggling with addiction pay a huge emotional, relational, and spiritual price as their lives unravel.

Remember the verse I mentioned earlier (Matthew 6:24), where Jesus said, “you can’t serve two masters ... you can’t serve both God and money.” Substitute whatever source of addiction you struggle with for the word “money” here, and meditate on the verse. Does it make sense? Do you agree? I believe it's true -- and tragic: For the addict, the substance or behavior in question becomes his or her master. Everything else gets pushed to the sidelines.

In his Salon essay “Harvard and Heroin,” writer Seth Mnookin writes about how his addiction came to dominate and destroy his life. What he says about heroin could be applied to any source of addiction:

Addiction not only destroys people physically, it destroys them spiritually -- it destroys their relationships, it destroys their faith, it destroys their self-respect, and it destroys their dreams.

This topic is closely related to addiction, but it’s helpful to discuss it separately. Codependency means different things to different people, but I like how Graham White defines it: 

When we do this, our relationships deteriorate, because we over-function, become anxious and fearful, and often wind up becoming manipulative, controlling, and/or passive-aggressive. We don't simply want things to be okay with another person, we need them to be okay, because if they are not okay, we are not okay.
 
Many people are so sidetracked by the drama of relationships in their lives that they’re unavailable to serve other people and make a difference in the world. If you spend your whole life care taking of someone else, cleaning up their messes, shielding them from the consequences of their behavior, struggling to stay in their good graces, living in the roller coaster of their destructive emotions, what time and energy do you have left? 
  
If you over-focus on someone else’s life, who is going to support you as you fulfill your destiny? If you are not living your dreams, who will? If you aren’t fulfilling the mission you were brought into this world to fulfill, what’s going to happen to that mission? 
 
If your dreams are not being lived out, think of all the people who could be blessed through you who will miss out, because you’re not doing what you were created to do.
 

Maybe you think that caring for another person IS your mission, and you struggle to identify what you are doing as codependence, because you feel that what you are doing for this other person is your primary contribution. In some situations -- such as parenting and nursing -- the line between care-giving and codependence can seem blurry. Maybe you feel that your true calling is wrapped up in helping someone else succeed … or recover from injury or trauma.

Maybe you're right.

If this is truly your mission, then go for it! You will be blessed, and find a measure of joy and satisfaction in the work. Just beware of the twin dangers of care-giving: 

(a) losing touch with your own needs, and failing to practice self-care  
(b) doing things for the person you’re caring for that they can -- and should -- be doing for themselves. This tires you out, and robs them of opportunities for growth, responsibility, and dignity. 

If you find yourself feeling used and resentful in the process of caring for others, it's time to do some soul-searching about those "twin dangers of care-giving."