There is an ebb and flow in the spiritual life. There are times when we feel the joy of spiritual connection: when we sense God's presence in and with us, when we feel like our prayers are routinely being answered, when things make sense. Then there are times when God seems absent, when our prayers seem to bounce off the ceiling, when nothing makes sense.
Spiritual teachers speak of these as "desert places." Times in our lives where the "living waters" the Bible talks about that flow from our innermost being (John 7:38) have dried up.
Most people are woefully unprepared for times when God seems to go quiet, and they feel spiritual empty. I've gone through times like these ... as have most Christians I know who've been on the spiritual path for very long.
I've been really helped by the teaching of St. John of the Cross, a 16th century priest and writer who emphasized that these desert places have an important role to play in our spiritual growth. He teaches that desert times and places aren't the result of spiritual failure in our spiritual lives ... they come because God intentionally brings us to such places to teach us and help us grow.
In other words, these desert places are an essential ingredient of spiritual growth.
There are many translations of St John's works, and some are difficult to read. One book I heartily recommend is "
You Set My Spirit Free," by David Hazard. Hazard distills John's works into excerpts of three or four-page chapters, making them easier to understand and
make sense of.
Here are some passages that might be helpful for anyone facing desert times:
"Many Christians find themselves in a place they describe as 'spiritual dryness.' The symptoms are these: restlessness, and a spirit that cannot be consoled by the inner comforts that once brought them peace.
"And because these souls do not recognize their true inner need, they mistakenly focus upon the outer trappings of the Christian life. They complain that 'something is wrong' with other Christians, or with the faith itself. They are hungry and thirsty for something, but they do not know what it is.
"Many wrongly believe that they should always be experiencing newer and better delights of the soul. They may think that others are at fault for not attending to their spiritual needs, and for not giving them new and sweet truths, or new and exciting spiritual experiences. Though they do not see it this way, of course, they want to be catered to, fed just the right amount of 'spiritual delicacies' that will lift and delight their soul."
This is very insightful, and I think helps explain some of the churn we see happening in churches today. People change churches more often than they change cell phone providers. If we don't feel like we're growing the way we want to be, then it must be that the church we're going to isn't 'feeding us' the way we need to be fed. So maybe going somewhere else will help.
But living with this external focus -- especially when it's tied to ignorance of how God works in the soul -- will create an endless cycle that will produce repeated dissatisfaction. The next church will disappoint too ... just in other ways.
But more importantly, one thing this cycling from one place to another will NOT produce is spiritual growth, inner peace, and ultimate happiness. Why? Because those things only come on the other side of the desert. On the other side of struggle. If we don't recognize that, and keep ourselves distracted by focusing on more -- or different -- spiritual input, we'll not do the inner work we need to do.
(Of course I recognize there are times when moving to a different church is necessary. What I'm concerned about here is the phenomena of church-hopping that stems from a consumer-focused view of spirituality.)
In another place, John talks about how God allows struggle and suffering ... and uses this to help us grow. He calls this the "flame of God."
"The soul that begins to pursue this higher way of God does not understand what is happening when the flame of God comes to purge him. ... I will say it plainly: the fire of Love that will afterward unite with the soul and bring it glory is the same fire which begins by assailing it in order to cleanse and purify.
"In order to picture this, think of the way that fire penetrates a log. As the flame begins it burns away the outer imperfections, stripping the log of scars and roughness. As the heat mounts, the fire penetrates into the log itself, until wood and flame are one. Just so, fire transforms wood into fire.
"At first, as I said, the soul feels that God is subjecting it to so many terrible and trying circumstances. It suffers greatly, wondering if it is merely abandoned by God to great afflictions. From the depth of its being, the soul may overflow with emotion and weeping -- for now the flame of God feels only oppressive. ...
"True, there are times when the heat of His loving advance feels sweet, but there are also times of inner torment and affliction. This is not at all pleasant, but rather makes the soul believe it is wandering in an abandoned and arid wasteland.
"I want to strengthen you for such times with this knowledge: The dark fire of God is His remedy and medicine, which He gives to the soul to treat its many diseases. He does so, only to bring the soul back to health ... to drive from it every kind of spiritual evil."
